Day of Worry

Despite being THIS close to tossing his cookies, and despite being white as a picket fence, and despite being unable to walk more than ten steps without catching his breath, AND (you thought I was finished!) despite being so ill that he lost EIGHT POUNDS in 48 hours, that crazy cowboy WENT to the University today to teach his classes.

He couldn't even drive there! I drove him! And I tried to perfectly balance (a) the expression of my opinion that he should stay home; with (b) taking his "no" for an answer.

The last view I had of him, he was walking very slowly toward his office, slightly hunched over, and holding on to a chain link fence beside him for support, as all the students hurried past him. I saw him pull the shoulder strap of his heavy backpack to the side so the strap wouldn't bang into his still-not-completely-healed-port bandage.

Now all I can do is stare at the phone, hoping it rings, asking me to come get him and bring him home and put him to bed with some chocolate Ensure to sip and the kisses of three puppies for his nose and fluffy pillows for his head.

I feel so sad for him today.